武士
The cover of the box to the film 武士 uses the word “spectacle” in describing this film and relates the huge sum of money and time this film cost to make. And this time and investment shows. The film is…well, a spectacle. For today’s review we have additional commentary from my sister in America.
The film tells the story of a group of Korean warriors stationed on the Sino-Korean border during the Koryeo dynasty (I think the film said it was 1347). The film starts off with a group of Koreans being left to die and subsequently getting attacked by Chinese bandits in a desert. The Koreans end up in some Arabian looking peoples camp (the dudes all looked like Princess Jasmine’s dad from Aladdin).
Anyhow, I watched this film without subtitles, and for some reason I was unable to comprehend the Koreans end up defending a Chinese princess in the deserts from the same desert bandits that got their beat down and sex on with a Chinese princess in Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (note to self: If I come back as a Chinese princess in antiquity stay the shit out of the Gobi Desert).
Anyhow these Koreans keep adding Chinese civilians to their posse as the traverse the lush landscapes and battle Chinese villains. The posse of Korean heroes breaks down like this: guy in red with big Final Fantasy VII style sword (player one), guy in black with big Final Fantasy style sword (player two), guy with an axe, old guy with a bow, dude with long hair and a spear thing, Buddhist monk, and my personal favorite, guy with a harpoon and rope. Let’s look at my conversation with my sister (who is more knowledgeable about Korean flicks than me)
Me: you know “Please teach me English” right?
My Sister: yup…i own it
Me: could you believe that one guy (the pizza delivery guy who marries the teacher in the end) as a warrior from the Koreyo era who has harpoons and ropes as weapons?
My Sister: hahahah no!
Me: Me either. Everytime he comes on screen I want to be like “사랑해유!” (cuz he spoke in a dialect in that movie where words end with 유 as opposed to 요”)
My Sister: yeah i thought he sounded weird
Anyhow after several desert battles and a battle in a forest in which the red big sword hero is wounded. The Koreans and their Chinese entourage make their way into an old fortress in the middle of nowhere.
Me: this movie is a lot like willow. The Koreans (with a Chinese princess) just got an abandoned fort and now the Chinese are trying to get her back. I’m waiting for someone to turn into a big ass dragon.
My Sister: that would be hella sweet
Me: yeah but instead i just got some decapitations
That’s right, decapitations! I have come to understand that the Korean film industry is awfully fond of dismemberment. Maybe I just need to stop watching action / adventure / horror movies. Anyhow shortly after the Korean warriors arrive at the fortress they are attacked.
Me: This can’t be the final showdown…but it seems like such a final showdown
My Sister: haha the concept of “the final showdown.” It’s just so ridiculous…and awesome
Me: oh shit a guy just had a “bomb.” It’s like a cartoon bomb (aka black ball with a fuse)
My Sister: hahah for real? That’s the most boss thing ever!
Me: yeah! This movie is nuts. I wish I could understand the plot better.
My prediction of the final showdown was a tad premature, and ended with the heroes getting a little bit ravaged (the axe hero lost an eye and started wearing an eye patch), and then had infighting because the spear hero was show boating.
The real final showdown occurs and well, I don’t want to give away the ending, but it’s a pretty typical ending to a Korean action movie. The movie was pretty decent, and the fights were top notch. There was a lot in the fight scenes that reminded me of Braveheart, but more intense. During this film I realized that I can understand Korean subtitles quite well (there was a lot of Chinese dialogue with Korean subtitles). Often I could understand these subtitles better than some of the spoken (Korean) dialogue. Anyhow if you want to see an awesome historical action flick check out 武士!
Note: For those of you unfamiliar with Chinese characters the title 武士 (무사 in 한글) means “warrior” or “knight.”
