西洋오랑캐

The 11th was the big day…again since I already was married back in January, but today was the day in which I had to go through all the pomp and circumstance.

Basically the day began when I woke up at 4 am, took a shower, and then went and got my hair done. Also I wore makeup, which I rationalized as being okay due to the fact that ancient Korean warriors known as 화랑 also wore makeup. I made the girl performing my ablutions aware of this little piece of historical fact as well. Also I told the lady doing my hair to do my hair in the fashion of King Sejong…only slightly more cute.

With hair and make-up all in check, much like that Busta Rhymes song, we arrived at the wedding hall. From here I don’t really remember much since the actual wedding basically consisted of various people dragging me around and telling me to hurry up. What I do remember is that prior to the actual ceremony we had to go get some photos taken in which my wife wore some gigantic wig that was several pounds in weight and wrecked her neck’s shit. I do know that my brother also had to sport some sort of wig that was a fake topknot of black hair…which matched so well with his natural hair color. And the third thing I remember is that prior to my grand entry I was worried that I was going to mess stuff up.

As for the wedding ceremony itself, it was a lot like the time I had a bit part in the Shaker Junior High School production of Hello Dolly. “Wyatt, I don’t understand.” Oh, I never told you, I once played a court stenographer and a cop in junior high. “No. No…how was it like middle school theater?” Ah! It was kind of like a middle school play in that I was wearing makeup, worried about messing up my part, and there were insanely hot spot lights on me…and there were song and dance numbers.

Also it was further like a middle school musical in that I knew there were a ton of people in the audience, but I could not make out the faces of any of them…nor could my wife. At one point in the ceremony, Jinhui leaned over to me and proclaimed, “The only person I can see is Nathan because his mustache is so outstanding.”

Following the wedding the family (families) were lead into a small ante-room (everyone else got to eat), where Jinhui and I had to bow to my parents again, and then they threw nuts at us…also I had to give my parents booze. Then I had to drink brew with my wife, and then carry her on my back and walk around a table. If you think I’m making any of this up, check out the pictures I have posted at Flickr.

After the wedding we had to greet everyone and thank them for coming, I kind of felt bad because I had to rush around at this point (since there were a lot of people) and didn’t really get to spend enough time with the people that I wanted to thank / take pictures with. So to my friends, if I didn’t give you a “Thanks for attending dude!” or a high five or a “와 주셔서 대단히 감사합니다,” I am truly sorry, but thank you for attending. HIGH FIVE!!!

After the wedding, we hung out and were lazy and then I went to Myeong-dong with my siblings for shopping, dinner (만두 and 칼국수), and then had some beers. The photos are here. Due to the fact that Korea has no such thing as an open container law, my brother consumed brew in the street in front of a cop car. Then we stuck them on a bus and we headed home.