To quote the great poet lauret of my times, M.C. Hammer, “We outta here baby!” At present I am way out of South Korea for at least two years, but more likely than not, for keeps. That’s right kids, I’m back in the US and A. Now I could take this time to get all misty-eyed and recap the good times, possibly with some sort of montage set to the Green Day song, “Time Of Your Life,” but where would the fun in that be. So instead I’m going to report on the ten things I will not miss once I leave the country that has been my home these past four years.
1. Random people pointing at me and declaring:
a) “Hello,” or some other random English phrase and then laughing at however I respond.
b) “Wow a foreigner!”
2. 회식. Not so much the meal itself, but the fact that they are pretty much mandatory here. Seriously I have better things to do on a Friday evening that hit up noraebang with the boss.
3. Vomit on the streets.
4. Gag Concert, 웃찾사, et. al. I could live here a thousand years, and I still would not understand what makes any of these shows funny.
5. Buses. In particular the 마을 버스.
6. “빨리! 빨리!” There are seriously some things that don’t need to be done at the speed of light.
7. The shock and awe of others at my ability to do incredibly simple tasks such as using chopsticks.
8. …
Aw I can’t do it! I’ve had a great time here I don’t wanna go!!! I’m going to miss cheap as hell Korean food. I’m going to miss wicked fast internet access. I’m going to miss the fact that I can get pretty much everything delivered to my house. I’ll even miss the randomness that are the commercials on AFKN. Camp Casey, Area 2…thanks for being here so I could watch Three Stooges re-runs, and The George Lopez show! Shit…where’s a video of “Time Of Your Life?”
Anyhow that’s it. I haven’t decided if I’ll continue writing here or not, either way I will most likely not do anything before March here, so for the meantime, if you need to get in touch with me send an email. Thanks for everything. This is Wyatt Dunn signing off.
